Amused to pieces by an Amazon review that complains about After Nature's support for democracy and asserts, "An authoritarian leader with a real commitment to solving these problems could be more effective," I decided to apply the benevolent authoritarian standard to a sample of reviews and commentary.
Other
Amazon review: “What this pattern-weave bathmat lacks
is a commitment to benevolent authoritarianism. Three stars.”
Yelp review
of new Thai restaurant: "I liked the
drunken noodles, and the appetizers came out quickly; but the service showed a
distinct lack of grit; I left still hungry for the feel of the iron fist within
the velvet glove. Two stars."
RateMyProfessor Review of male
professor: “Obviously very knowledgeable, even though he couldn’t always answer
our questions. Sometimes intimidating,
but that’s his job! LOL Didn’t beat us enough, though. Three stars.”
RateMyProfessor
Review of female professor: “Great shoes!
Didn’t seem self-confident, sometimes couldn’t answer our questions,
which made wonder if she’s really an expert.
LOL. Didn’t beat us enough. Two
stars.”
David
Brooks column: Will you people please tell me how to live my life meaningfully,
already? Have I mentioned that freedom
is a burden? I’m giving you all two
stars; no, three, because I’m still the friendly conservative.
Yelp review of old Chinese restaurant:
“The egg rolls were fine. Nice to have
forks as well as chopsticks. The General
Tsao’s Chicken did not lay to waste my stomach and burn the fields of my
intestines, nor did it build a new society on the ashes. Three stars.”
Focus-group
review of Bernie Sanders debate performance: “Liked his clear talk about
inequality, political corruption, prison reform. Felt good to be harangued a little. But I was really hoping a so-called socialist
would assign me a job and tell me which uniform to wear to work. They don’t make ‘em like they used to!
Two-and-a-half stars.”
Focus-group
review of Donald Trump’s campaign: Five stars.
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